They say people born with the Cancer star sign are usually known to be very homely and close to the family. What do you think?

I reckon I am relatively family-oriented. So I guess it’s partly true?

Perhaps it is evident considering the fact that I’ve already flown to Penang just last weekend to visit mom and dad.

But here I am again catching the next train straight to Ipoh to spend time with the (extended) family for Mother’s Day.

Outfit shot! Mother’s Day dinner celebration with themumsie.

Like mother like daughter, don’tcha think? 

Hello! 😀 Took some selfies en route to the restaurant too. Heh!

I mean.. come on, who wouldn’t spend Mother’s Day with their mothers if they can help it?

I have three (actually four, including our long-serving maid!) very important Superwomen in my life. I wouldn’t dream of spending Mother’s Day without them!

L-R: The Mom – Grandmom – Godmom – Not a mom.

We made a dinner reservation for five at Ipoh’s latest establishment which boasts a concept of classy, fine Italian dining.

Being the blogger that I am, Marianis Italian Ristorante piqued my interest as small town Ipoh hosts only a small handful of exquisite eateries. I was way too excited to see what this new kid on the block has to offer! 

The facade.

As we stepped in, I could tell that I liked the interior decor in an instant.

The well-decorated, spacious and chandelier-lit restaurant had a very baroque-meets-modern feel to it.

There were ample, beautiful seating catering to the different preferences of its patrons.

Lounge sofas, bar top tables, proper sit-down dining, high stools, long tables for large groups, al-fresco and more.

Note to smokers: There are two smoking zones in Marianis.

The open-aired front (pictured above) and the back (pictured below).

We chose the regular dining table as granny wouldn’t be comfortable slouching on a sofa.

(It’s bad for her back if she did!)

Food-wise, I was impressed with their menu and how the menu physically looked.

They were immensely thick and protected by faux leather, all neatly arranged on shelves which reminded me of novels by the likes of J.K Rowling and J.R.R Tolkien the way you would recognize in an instant, on a library bookcase.

The menu featured tapas, appetizers, soups, salads, Focaccias, pasta, main entres, pizzas, dessert and a wide range of alcholic and non-alcoholic beverages. 

Had some fun with the camera while waiting for our food to arrive.

Smile! Let’s get some Mother’s Day snaps rolling in! 

Check out some of the dishes we ravished.

From the Marianis Antipasti (Marianis Appetizers) line-up, we selected:

Calamari Fritti

They were very succulent pieces of fresh squid coated in special batter, deep fried to perfection and served with tartar sauce.

Melanzana Griglia

Fresh eggplant grilled in olive oil.

The dish came extremely and unbearably (rock) salty and after all of us had our first bite, we requested for a change.

When it was served for the second time, it was perfect!

Ice-cold beer!

Occasional sips of alcohol did no one any harm!

(Who am I kidding?) 😛 😛 😛

However I was very disappointed with my cappuccino.

As a heavy coffee drinker (4 cups of cappuccino from various cafes daily), it was the first time I’ve ever tasted coffee like this. 

It was bland and had a strange twang to it. Perhaps the ratio of coffee to milk was a bit off? 

Trancia Di Cod

The grilled fillet of cod fish served with sun-dried tomato sauce was a sure winner.

It was absolutely delicious!

Filetto Eye of Sirloin! (Forgot to take down its exact name)

Granny and I loved this to the very last bite.

Cross section of the steak. We ordered it medium well and it was perfectly executed.

The cut was very succulent, bursting with flavour at just the right tenderness. Yum!

Focaccia Marianis

This dish however, failed to impress.

The Focaccia bread was very limp and all its ingredients were served cold.

It came sandwiched in lettuce, sliced tomatoes, mozzarella cheese and mushroom sauce, but surely the grilled chicken breast (and the bread) ought to be served hot or warm at least?

Pizza! Alla Salmone

This thin-crust pizza featured smoked salmon, capers and cheese.

Each slice was delicious and crispy!

For desserts, I asked for a recommendation and the waiter suggested this.

It surely did not disappoint! 

Tortino al Cioccolato

Chocolate brownies with a scoop of ice-cream. Very, very tasty – thumbs up!

Ironically, this dessert hardly had the texture nor consistency of a ‘brownie’, as it was named.

Perhaps it would be more apt if it was renamed a chocolate lava cake in my opinion.

We took lots of photos around Marianis’ vicinity – how could we not? 

The ambience was to die for and the lighting proved just right for picture-perfect moments. 

Overall, I would say it was a relatively pleasant dining experience except for the few aforementioned glitches in the food.  I would recommend Marianis to anyone, unless you are a harsh food critic or an experienced food reviewer too.

Plus points: the environment was lovely, while the waiting staff were friendly and accommodating.

The price tag on the food, however, was a little on the pricey side for Ipoh standards. Nothing too exorbitant but just a tad more expensive in comparison. Nevertheless, I’ll definitely be back for the Stinco d’ Agnello al Forno (Lamb Shank) and the Beef Short Ribs!

I wouldnt label it a fine-dining place though; but more towards a very nice, upscale restaurant that you definitely wouldn’t want to wear your bermudas nor slippers in.

Perfect for romantic dates, birthdays, anniversaries and family gatherings. 

Just put your best foot forward without the extent of dressing to the nines!

Happy Mother’s Day to all the marvellous moms out there, especially mine.

No one receives any training to be a mother, but you sure as ever did a fantastic job raising me – armed with the right morals, the right principles, the right amount of discipline yet with tender loving care.

I couldn’t have done it any better.

Here’s a shout out for the hot mamas, grandmothers, great-grandmothers, godmothers, aunts, nannies, guardians, babysitters and if you’re some sort of a maternal figure to someone, all my love goes out to you too!

Give yourself a pat on the back for a job well done! Hey, it isn’t easy raising a child, let alone children! 

Also, shout outs to my circle of girl friends who have just turned mothers themselves; celebrating their first or second Mother’s Day with their newborns and toddlers.

Seeing you girls already being dedicated, proud mums to your bundle of joy (read: screaming infants) kinda makes me think what I’m doing with my life.

You are all busy bearing children while here I am busy with my career, partying really hard and training for a set of rock solid abs. I’m starting to get the feeling that something must not be quite right here LOL  

Life is still one big party for me. Maybe I’m just a late bloomer and prefer to maximize my youth before I move on to later stages in life. *shrugs*

So granny (and mom) stop pestering/hinting for a kid now – I’m far from ready.

Oh wait… now that I think about it, scratch that.

Happy Mother’s Day to me as well! *cheers*

I am a mother too you know, to my two year old son – my furkid Chivas.

 Being a mommy to him isn’t easy as well. He doesn’t just sit there and look pretty.

He eats, he excretes (a lot), he gets tangled, he smells.

He bugs me for food and water but spills everything all over the floor.

He wails for attention, he distracts me from my work and he wants to play.

He makes my fabric sofa and furniture look like an aftermath of a zombie apocalypse.

He walks all over me when I sleep.

He bites, he scratches, he slaps my face with his bushy tail.

He cries to be let into the bedroom, but begs to get out the next minute.

He clings to the  outside of the window railings and gives me a heart attack.

He jumps into bed with me for cuddles but struggles away after a second of cuddling.

He slashes me with his Wolverine claws during shower time.

He pukes out hairballs in the middle of the living room floor for me to clean up after.

He walks all over my keyboard and has accidentally composed and replied emails in gibberish.

(Dear recipient, I am not drunk. That was just my cat, I kid you not) 

But despite it all, I love him unconditionally as I am after all, his one and only mother.

For the mere sound of his soft meows and purrs at the front door greeting me the moment I come home, instantly makes every drop of sweat, effort, time and money worth the world.

I love you, son.

And regardless of your super high-and-mighty, pampered I-am-the-King-of-the-universe attitude (yes yes, I know you are a pure-bred cat but that doesn’t mean you can play nasty with the other kids), I will still defend and adore you to heaven and back.

Throwback: Mommycat and Babycat on the first day I brought him home as a kitten.

My little boy all grown up. Like mother like son?

I miss him! He’s currently staying with theJaanu as I have been away for several weekends back in Penang. Thank you dearest, for babysitting my son in my absence! x

This concludes the Mother’s Day special edition.

Happy Mother’s Day again from Jessicat and Babycat!

I really need to get this niggling thought off my chest.

Been feeling this way for quite a while and thought I’d let it all go here. I’ve been dying to say something about the controversial orthopedic shoe that has been permeating the footwear trend as of late.

I THINK BIRKENSTOCKS, FITFLOPS AND CROCS ARE DOWNRIGHT UGLY.

There, I said it. I feel much better now.

Disclaimer – I sincerely hope you keep an open mind, instead of being offended by what I’m about to say – especially if you’re a fan of these shoes. I know how sensitive or defensive some may be!

This would be akin to opening a can of worms so I apologize in advance should you be offended 🙁

Bear in mind that this is only my personal opinion and individual taste that you so happen to read. You probably have your opinion too – do share!

I want to know what you think. 

To quench my curiosity, I’ve even done a survey with a sample size of 100 people of random demographics.

Eww. Just, no.

Do they REALLY like its design or are they wearing it just for ergonomic purposes?

I know comfort definitely plays a huge part. But a vast majority of you answered that you really think it looks awesome! Here are the results from the data I’ve tabulated.

I’ve often asked myself, what exactly do I not like about it? 

There’s no answer. I just think they’re horrendous and not something I would choose to wear if I had the choice.

But I don’t. At least not anymore.

The soles of my feet have been killing me lately. I’ve tried everything from foot massages/reflexology and walking on pebbled paths to massaging my feet by myself. Nothing worked. I blame this on the ludicrously high heels I strut in.

So after months of contemplation, research and utmost reluctance, I decided to get a pair of Birkenstocks – only because I needed an orthopedic  shoe to aid my poor, aching feet. Groan. 

I didn’t want something that every Tom, Dick and Harry is wearing so I chose these babies instead.

Pretty colour combination. Somehow, it appears to look rather sweet.

The footbed is the original Birkenstock footbed – featuring a pronounced arch support, deep heel cup, and roomy toe box.

The footbed molds and shapes to your foot. Now it has my footprint embedded in it!

Pointlessly showing you the soles of my new Birkies.

They’re pink and pretty so I guess that is, in itself, a point made.

Trying to get used to seeing something I absolutely detest on my own feet.

The colour scheme made it easier for me to attempt liking it.

The upper material is a fully adjustable strap made of acrylic and polyamide felt fibers.

This material is a soft fabric with a smooth leather-like finish.

I swear, every single step felt like my feet were being massaged and kneaded.

Well worth my 300 bucks!

The sole material is called the EVA sole. It is flexible, lightweight, durable and shock absorbing.

 Oh, hey! Look. The buttons even matches my pastel pink toenails.

 Extra brownie points for it, I reckon! 

Maybe I like you after all.

For the inquisitive, mine are the White Patent Birko-Flor Gizeh.

It has been two weeks since I’ve worn them and I must say, quite sheepishly, these babies have begun to grow onto me. 

Magically, my feet no longer hurt. The arch support does wonders for your feet – I kid you not!

Whilst browsing, I also considered the FitFlops.

The ones I saw on display were just chunky and downright horrible, in my opinion. And I couldn’t see myself buying a pair of aesthetically-lacking footwear despite how comfortable they are.

But for the record, I’ve tried and tested them – FitFlops are comfortable too.

I’ve personally seen a few friends wearing rather visually-arresting FitFlops. They were attractive but why don’t I see them on display anymore? Have they been completely sold out? REVEAL YOURSELF!

Whilst in the store, these were the only ones, to me, that I think I would actually be caught wearing.

Not bad, right? Why don’ they have a variety for those who want both comfort and style?

Crocs, on the other hand, has been a thing in my family.

There are altogether approximately 15 pairs of Crocs in my household. I personally think they look like boats on my feet.

But the best thing about Crocs nowadays is how they’ve designed their newer models to NOT LOOK LIKE the typical undesirable-looking Crocs.

I’ve seen the ones that look like Converse, street-styled sneaker-like ones and rather rugged boots for the guys as well as cute flats to high-heeled ones for girls.

Good job to the R&D team! 

Check out the related posts I wrote about Crocs in 2010 here and here.

***

So that was it, my thoughts between Birkenstock, FitFlop and Crocs.

I own and have worn all of them and if you were to ask me to compare the most comfortable? I’d tell you that it really all depends on what you’re looking for or what kind of feeling/pressure you would like to feel at the soles of your feet. 

In brief comparison:

Birkenstocks are harder. The more you wear it, the more it moulds to your feet.

FitFlops feel like you’re walking on bouncy sponge.

Crocs are just rubbery and snug. And it does cure flat-feet.

The price range for these three brands is more or less similar. A little pricey (from RM250-RM500), but if you’re paying for more than just something you’d wear on your feet, I’d say you’re definitely getting your money’s worth.

A penny for your thoughts, perhaps?

Hiya dear readers!

I know Chinese New Year isn’t exactly over yet because there are 15 days of it in total (much like the Twelve Days of Christmas!) but hey, it’s already the 11th Day of CNY so I might as well get started on this post.

You know how I am when I procrastinate LOL.

Also, you are now reading this post on the 16th February even though I began writing it on the 10th. So obviously, Chinese New Year is now over as we speak hence deeming the paragraph above irrelevant. See what I told you about procrastinating? Bleh.

So let’s get on with today’s post before I digress, shall we?

I took a day off from work, so Chinese New Year 2014 began with me jet-setting back home to Penang on the morning of CNY eve.

The 45 minute flight was tiresome. Can’t someone invent a teleporter already? 45 minutes always leave me hanging – too short a time to sleep, too long a time to do anything else when you’re not allowed to use the phone onboard.

Read, you say? I don’t like the edges of my book getting all ratty and folded up whenever I take it travelling. 

My CNY-themed nails I did the night before I departed KL. 

With prosperity and auspiciousness in the air, you can’t go wrong with red and gold for Chinese New Year!

 High in the sky at 9am.

Couldn’t get any sleep so I was snapping away on my camera instead.

Arrived home and I was initially thinking of heading out to spend some time with my friends back home since I wouldn’t be able to spend much time in Penang this CNY but somehow, my forty winks ended up in a long, deep sleep for four whole hours.

Drats. 

 But when I woke up to this, I cheered up instantly.  Pretty sure you would too.

This was how my family reunion dinner looked like – steamboat!

 Mom, Dad and I enjoying our steamboat dinner at the comfort of

our own home – all lit up flamboyantly with CNY decor no less!

That’s us playing with firecrackers and sparklers too.

Chinese New Year 2014 – Day One (大年初一) 

Woke up bright and early to loud CNY music resonating in my room all the way from the living room downstairs!

Daddy has a knack for blasting loud music during any festive season. Dolled up and made my way down to join the rest.

 Day One selfies!

Went into the living room to find mom and dad dressed similarly in traditional Chinese wear too.

Speaking of coincidence! This year is the first year I’ve actually donned a traditional outfit for Chinese New Year. Usually, I’d just throw on a red top or a red dress. So to see my parents dressed likewise was really a pleasant surprise! 

Daddy-O and I.

Mummykins and I.

 Definitely a member of the family too, after 12 years with us. Kakak and I!

Took another selfie with the red-hot ladies of the house.

Daddy then called us all over for angbao time. 

So as tradition goes, we are to greet each other and give a spiel of wishes and blessings unto the other. I’m bad at this, so I usually just go Gong Xi Fa Chai and some of the other sayings (which are so cool it rhymes!) that granny used to teach me.

Angbao moments. There’s one for everyone!

Time for family portraits!

I didn’t want to bombard this page with the innumerable family portraits we took, so here’s my favorite one.

 Love it so much I’m even considering developing this and putting it up in a frame!

 Not-so-formal family portrait – SELFIE STYLE!

Before the sun set, we made our way onto the North-South Highway for a road trip down south to spend the rest of our CNY Day One with my extended family. It was lucky that we were driving against the ridiculous traffic of the festive season! 

It was an insane gridlock on the highway north-bound. We could see it from our side of the road. Phew!

 Setting up the dinner table.

 Firing up the grill for our barbeque!

 Uncle Mike was the mastermind behind the whole barbeque party and with his minions in the kitchen, we were fed with a scrumptious home-made feast straight from the grill!

Food placements on the table with red wine for everyone!

 No, this doesn’t include Penny our Silky Terrier in the background.

  A shot of some of the other food we made

Giant salad bowl, some kind of pork (I didn’t eat a single one), flower crabs,

Thai noodles, rice and sausages wrapped with bacon with potato wedges.

 Snapped from my seat.

 Group photo of all of us! Family + long-time family friends. 

We had a wonderful time! Long conversations, so much fun and catching up.

 When darkness descended, we started to play with paper lanterns, also known as Kuomintang to the Chinese folk.

 I wrote my well-wishes on it before I lit it up and set it to fly to above and beyond.

 Prepare for take-off!

 Firing the blazing ember!

 Looks like we’re ready.

 One for the road!

 Up, up and awaaayy!!

We watched it with glee as it drifted slowly away from our line of vision before fading into the darkness.

And that was pretty much how CNY Day One was like for me. Moving on… 

Chinese New Year 2014 – Day Two (大年初二)

I woke up pretty late due to the late night before. But not too late to doll up for our family luncheon at Casuarina Hotel in Meru. Wanna take a look at what they have to offer? Read on. 

Today,  I wore something oriental again. It was the traditional Chinese Cheongsam!

 Selfies!

Proper full-length outfit of the day shot!

 Group selfie! The boys at the back were still busy with the food LOL

 Part of the Yee Sang dish on the buffet spread

 Wit the chef at the carving station.

Take a look at the well-plated and colourful spread of roast beef, chicken and lamb!

Only downside though, most of the cuts were cold as the roast station didn’t

come with the spotlight heat lamp.

 At the cold cut table. There was quite a number of food on the hot food area and it was very widely spread apart so I didn’t bother taking a photo (this isn’t one of my food review ads anyway)

 Chinese New Year cookies and cake were part of the selection too.

Sweet treats like pies, cakes, tarts and ice-cream were abundant.

 Fancy a healthier alternative? Here, have some fruits for dessert instead. 

We thought the buffet spread was decently palatable and it was satisfying lunch buffet. Could do with lots of room for improvement but seeing as it is a hotel newly constructed in the area, it was a fairly good attempt! 

Check out some family photos we snapped after lunch.

When we were just about done, I began exploring all around the hotel and its vicinity. 

Found a pretty place full of Chinese New Year decor for more photo ops! 

 Test shot.  Okay, I’m loving this podium area already!

Was busy taking selfies when Uncle Mike appeared like a wild fox out of the blue

and stuffed this Mandarin Orange into my mouth. Hey, can’t you see I’m busy? 😛 😛

Got mom to take a couple of shots for me while waiting for the whole motley crew to arrive.

How pretty is the decor, right?

Spent every day of my childhood years with these two women in my life.

Mommy & kakak.

 Flanked by my homeboys, couzzies Shaun & Meng!

Shaun had a random idea to flex our biceps for the camera LOL.

We’ve got the powaaaahh! Say what?

CNY 2014 family photo! It’s a shame daddy didn’t join us for the dinner though;

it would be complete otherwise!

My beloved Popoh and I. Or MeeMaw. Or Gran. Or Gramma. Or Granny.

Or however you wanna call it.

 She’s the only grandparent I have left now so I’m holding on to her real tight! 

Every Chinese New Year, we celebrate her birthday.

I can’t recall a single CNY not celebrating Popoh’s birthday!

The rest of Chinese New Year Day Two was just spent lounging around at home, gambling with relatives and catching up. All I did at night was read a few magazines and curled up to watch The Big Bang Theory.

Okay, time for the next day! 

Chinese New Year 2014 – Day Three(大年初三)

 Selfies in the car!

Wearing another oriental top – this time in lime green with motifs of Chinese flowers.

I don’t exactly like the presence of children in general but I think I’m beginning to get the hang of it.

Meet my 9 year old cousin.

It was Yee Sang day for us today! LOUUUUU AHHHHH!

*insert Chinese quotes/wishes that rhyme here*

I should really memorize it and recite it with pride next year. It’ll be fun 

We headed out to the mall for some shopping and coffee. Coincidentally, there was a stage performance going on.

It was the Chinese New Year acrobatics troupe from China! Check them out. Their skills are pretty badass. Click the image to watch the short videoclip.

Watching the #Chinese #acrobatics troupe perform. OMG their balance, stability and flexibility are top notch!! #CNY

Wow so proud of our local #Chinese #acrobatics troupe! Why didn’t my parents send me to such classes when I was a nimble kid? So epic; I’m so impressed. I wanna do that too!!

When all was over and done with, I decided to adjourn back to KL on Monday.

Didn’t want to waste the extra leave I initially applied for as I may have plans to jet-set somewhere far away this year.  

Nothing concrete yet; just sketchy plans for a one-week vacay.

Maybe I should throw a dart on the world map and see where it lands hehe.

Goodbye shot. At the Ipoh Railway Station! 

My Chinese New Year 2014’s accessories are sponsored by Swarovski and The Wild Things.

Will be blogging about their amazing Pandora-inspired charm bracelet soon!

In the meantime, check them out and pick your favorites. 

That marks an end to my Chinese New Year this year.

Actually no it doesn’t. Since there’s 15 days in total after all, I spent the rest of my CNY celebrating it with good friends and colleagues back in KL.

But since this post is relatively long enough and my mug of coffee is already empty, I should leave Part Two for another day. 

 Oh here’s a snap of some of my bounty.

No I don’t have any of it left as I used it all to settle all my bills.

I am debt-free now! 

I shall end my Chinese New Year 2014 blog post with a picture of my favorite ang pow.

It may not be the biggest, but it is hands-down, the best angpow I’ve received this year.

Hi there everyone.

I know I’ve been missing in action for a while, and by disappearing, I speak not of the commercialized content or ads I write, but rather the personal, heartfelt updates and penning my thoughts – or lack thereof – here in my own blog.

If you must know, I’ve been experiencing a roller-coaster ride of emotions and a turmoil of sorts for the past month. Allow me that time of self-reflection. I think is this the part where self-conflicts help you find yourself.

Oh and I recently had my iPhone stolen so that wasn’t very nice either.

But I’ll get to where I left of (in December, I know!), I promise.

It was a beautiful coincidence how I decided to withdraw myself into the comfort and solace of my own bedroom at home tonight for once but brimming with so much love once I finished watching  Disney’s latest animated movie – Frozen.

There’s something about enjoying the simple pleasures of solitude all wrapped up under your duvet.

It’s strange how I don’t feel forlorn, isolated nor lonely when the clock has just struck midnight on Valentine’s Day.

All because there is this (often overlooked) thing which we all ought to appreciate. It is called the ‘me time’, where you focus on you and nothing but you. 

I’ve always been a Disney girl at heart. I know all the characters by name and can even sing all the  soundtracks for you in a heartbeat.

Disney’s Frozen has taught and reminded me of not one, but two very important things:

1. Love is celebrated and felt by ALL who loves you unconditionally and accepts you for who you are, no matter the distance, shortcomings nor weaknesses.

Think sisterly/sibling love, maternal and paternal love, the love you feel amongst your tightest circle of friends, the guiding love for your pets, the love and respect you have for your bosses/superiors or teachers/lecturers (for those of you still in school), your colleagues, and so on.

2. Love is about sacrifice, care, putting someone else and his/her needs above yours, and doing all you can just to see that person happy.

If I truly loved that person, I’d revel in delight just to see him smile. After all, he is my world and all that’s in it. And every little thing he does just lights my day like a candle in the dark. It’s a beautiful thing to feel. You’d just glow throughout the day like a silly little girl.

I know exactly how that feels like. 

Being in love makes me smile. And this girl would do anything for the one she adores.

Like you have, I’ve been in love before too. Call me stupid but when I love, I do everything in my capacity for that one special someone. Love is a many splendid thing and although it’s something I truly bask in, I am now afraid. 

Afraid to open my heart again, afraid to fall in love again, and afraid to give my heart to anyone again – only to be hurt once more.

Frankly, I realized it didn’t bother me at all if I were to spend Valentine’s Day alone when every couple in the whole wide world is celebrating the overrated occasion that is February 14th. I actually thought I’d be alone this year on Valentine’s Day doing what I love most, training and working out in the gym.

Out of the blue, someone whom I met several days ago in the gym told he had a massive crush on me for a couple of weeks now.

Wow. I didn’t see that coming. I’ve always thought I looked like a total sweaty anti-social nut hammering it out alone in the gym ignoring every guy in the free-weights zone while I do my thing. Never thought anyone would notice me or think that I am, in any way, approachable. 

And guess what? He asked me out tomorrow, on Valentine’s Day. Hmmm.. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to go? I don’t want to think of it as a date, and it’s probably not, to be honest, as I am (maybe) still not ready to open my heart to anyone else yet.

But a little company tomorrow would be nice.

***

What is love now, anyway?

How is it that love can empower me with such mighty force yet simultaneously render me completely vulnerable? From what I’ve felt before, there’s one thing I can truly vouch for – the one you love is your pillar of strength yet your ultimate weakness, your kryptonite, at the very same time. 

I’m no love guru, but if it’s another thing I’ve learnt in this journey of love, I’d like to share with you a cardinal rule:

Many a time we expect too much from the one we love, and when he/she falls short, a wave of disappointment sweeps you by storm.

That’s why I’ve placed paramount importance in this to anyone I’ve dated or will date in the future as I’d rather be pleasantly surprised than to be thoroughly disappointed.  Why expect anything more when his love is what makes your world go round?

***

Also, what made my Valentine’s eve even sweeter was how a painful absence and distance I felt for another was soothed when we began talking again after a long silence. 

That itself made me realize that he still has a place in my heart after all. I believe that once you hold someone dear to you, that’s where he always will be, no matter the circumstances that stands in the way. After all, love isn’t a show or a social construct.

Love is how you feel for that person, whether or not clandestine, and that warmth resonating in you when that fleeting thought of him crosses your mind. 

I am grateful for the people (that includes all of you) that have graced my life and taught me more and more about what love is about, as well as all the variations of what love can be.

Which is why it’s time for me to step back, be on my own for now without any form of commitment and put myself first. Only true love can thaw this frozen heart.

I’ll share this powerful, thought-provoking song with all of you tonight.

Set your soul free, love yourself and allow February 14th to be a celebration of all the things you love most! 

This goes out especially to my dearest readers, friends and family. I love you all (even the silent readers) and thank you for also loving the blogger behind this blog for the past 9 years. But above all, thank you for growing with me.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all! 

Hi there. It’s the morning after and a new day… and it sure feels strange.

You don’t just spend three years of your life with someone and then be fully okay with the sudden absence, do you?

That’s only being human.

Firstly, I am overwhelmed by the tremendous support, motivation, and strength you guys have given me. 

From the bottom of my heart, I am thankful for all the people – friends, family, blog readers, social media followers, even to the ones I don’t personally know – flooding me with encouraging words, dropping me texts, @mentions, DMs, Facebook messages, emails, comments to check on me, how I’m doing and making sure I’m alright.

General answer: I am. (for now)

I am very, very touched. Thank you for showing me your concern, it means a lot.

Due to this, I understand that being a quite a public person/figure, my life is under scrutiny by pools of people – both near and far.

So here’s me, about to answer the top 10 questions I’ve been receiving over and over again, and just a few words (LOL more like a spiel) to express on my part before I close the chapter completely. 

***

I took leave from work on his last day yesterday, to help with some packing, to take him to the airport and needless to say, to spend the last few moments with him before he leaves for good.

Being a blubbering mess and crying myself to sleep for the past few days, I feared the one hour ride from airport to home all alone. This time, it will be different because it will be without him crying with me or wiping my tears away. 

But I was pleasantly surprised when I found out I wasn’t going to be alone. My friends offered to accompany me to the airport and back. I totally didn’t expect that at all, thanks for keeping me company getting late night supper and shisha after we left the airport too.

So thank you, so so very much. You all have my gratitude – especially when the airport isn’t exactly a stone’s throw away.

Goodbye. 

What you guys might not know is, prior to yesterday’s departure, we have already not been together for a few months now – a.k.a break up.

I decided so to mentally and emotionally prepare myself for this official separation.

You don’t just break up with someone at the airport on the day he/she leaves, do you? That will be utterly ridiculous and depressing.

Hence the pre-mature break up several months before. LOL. But this time, it is different. We won’t be by each other’s side anymore.

Are you ready to have your questions answered? Here we go.

Top 10 Questions about this separation.

(In no particular order)

1. How did you guys meet?

We met in Australia and got together in 2011 when I was abroad for studies.

You might want to read this post I wrote early last year.

2. Why did you guys break up?

Can you not use that word? I’d say ‘part ways’ or ‘going our separate ways’, as it has less of a negative ring to it.

Okay, there are many reasons, but one of the main reasons is – simply because we cannot be together anymore due to geographical separation. It’s not going to work. We both believe we are still young and have our own individual futures ahead of us. I also want to be on my own for a while and not be in any committed/exclusive relationship at the moment.

3. Why is he leaving?

He was here on Student VISA and was later studying by distance education, enabling him to stay in Malaysia for a while longer. And by January 2014, his VISA had expired. He then has to return home to finish up his studies and/or get a job.

4. Why can’t you guys LDR (Long Distance Relationship)?

Is your head stuck in the clouds? Wake up, from your pretty dream.

I’ve been there, done that. It doesn’t work, unless only temporarily. Should we do LDR, this LDR is going to be indefinite, and I sure as hell am not going to put myself through this emotional strain or the possibilities of fighting, arguing and eventually breaking up .

The stress caused by this? Not worth it and might even severe the close friendship.

5. Why don’t you follow him to Australia?

I’m not ready to move and migrate my entire life to another country (especially for a guy) when I have my dreams to achieve and career that I’ve built here. We’re both still young, there is so much ahead for us in life out there to fulfill and accomplish on our own beyond a relationship, thus I find it unwise to tie down so early.

I have my path to follow, and I believe he has his.

6. Why don’t you guys get married and stay in Australia?

Refer to (5). Apart from that, I have a very flawed opinion of marriage (for now). Perhaps I might change my mind once I meet Mr.Right/The One? Meh. Such idealist crap.

But right now, I want to pursue life and experience the journey as an individual first. Since after all, I’ll be spending the remaining decades of my life with my future husband till I’m old and grey, right? 🙂 Again, idealism.

Disclaimer: This is my own personal opinion. Yours may or may not differ but we are all entitled to make our own decisions based on our personal views/choice.

7. How do you feel? Are you okay?

Would you be okay spending three years attached to anyone or anything and then be jubilant when that someone or something is suddenly gone from your life? No? I thought so. What really terrifies me is when I do eventually blog about pending/old posts or travel trips and I have to sieve through hundreds of photos of us back during the good times and when were were still together. 

Note to self: I really shouldn’t keep delaying blog posts.  Case in point 🙁

8. Are you both still friends?
Of course we are! The best of friends. Just because you’re not in a relationship anymore doesn’t change the fact that we are and have always been close and good friends. You don’t exactly turn love into hatred or be enemies do you? 

At least I haven’t. You may have, then again depends how your relationship ended – whether amicably (like ours did) or otherwise.

9. What are you going to do now?

The same thing I do every day. Eat sleep rave repeat. (Just kidding, that’s a song)

Hmmm.. well, the same thing I do everyday? Eat sleep play gym work coffee. And of course, reshuffle my priorities and focus on a new beginning. My life will be exactly the same, the only difference is not having him around or by my side anymore.

10. What’s your current status?

Really? You guys have to ask me that?  Well, I am, technically (and have been for several months), single… but! Not available at the moment.

Many people have also told me they admired my strength and optimism.

Really?  Thank you. But think again.

Perhaps you haven’t seen the downtimes I bawl my eyes out like some kid who dropped his favorite ice-cream or the nights I cry myself to sleep and wake up the next morning with eyes so swollen you probably couldn’t tell the difference between me and a gremlin.

What? I look like Jess? Puh-leeze. She should be honoured.

What I want to project to the world is strength and optimism so I can constantly empower and remind myself to be that girl amalgamated by iron, chromium, mercury, titanium, steel, aluminium, mercury, platinum and all the other transition metals on the periodic table LOL. *geek alert*

Jesus Christ, it’s not the end of the world – I’ll be fine! *repeats to self* 

So don’t be fooled – LOL this is a confession, only expressed on my blog.

Hahaha! I’m kidding. Just found this quite humorous.

To be loved, you must first love yourself. And it begins today.

Allow me to digress. Truth is, as much as I hate to admit, I’ve never been single.

Yup. Unless you count the times I was a toddler wailing in my diapers, or that kid in junior school learning my multiplication table then yes, you read right. 

I’ve been blessed (if the three of you are reading this, thank you for the beautiful memories) to have good, strong relationships with my exes and I’ve never regretted being in serious, long-term relationships with them over the course of 9 years in total.

So this round, it’s time for me to be on my own again.

Hello, 15 year old girl! Where did I leave off? 

The farewell dinner – our favorite ribbies. (Inside joke)

There will always be awesome, beautiful memories of us in me.

I’ll try not to remember the horrible times or Kermit suicide okay? Haha (Another inside joke)

Thank you, for a memorable three years. This is it, my dear. The end of our chapter.

I am afraid but I believe we’ll keep our heads up and move on as time heals. All the best back in Australia! 

We’ll always remain the very best of friends though. Farewell and I’m sure I’ll see you again should we ever have our paths crossed in the future.