Amongst hordes of emails we people have to reply everyday, one particular friendly-introduction-turned-plight caught my attention. You know how similarly in an entry where I blogged about a moron who wanted to befriend and impress me (as well as a few of my other friends) by sending me a pathetic message on Facebook?

If you missed that,
it’s [here]

But this time, it’s slightly different. It’s an email from a girl residing all the way in Liberia, West Africa. Apparently a victim of war and wants to escape yet has access to the internet to contact me all the way here in Malaysia.

Oh, how tragic. *rolls eyes* Let’s hold hands and have a moment of silence.

Funny how she wants to ‘get to know me if I have the desire for her’ and will ‘send me her picture’ after I reply… for crying out loud! The atrocious photograph above was what she attached in her 2nd email by the way. It goes like this :

wanita

In case I accidentally offend anyone, of course, I have no qualms with anyone being homosexual. Their sexual preference is entirely their choice and will, which has nothing to do with me. I only called her a lesbian to emphasize the fact that the person she just contacted happens to be a female – me.

But this is what she replied :

wanita2
I totally felt like truncating her grandmother story -_-
and THE LAST SENTENCE IS SO CLICHE. GOSH!

Yes yes, distance, age or color doesn’t matter… hmm… But do clothes? Nice cropped denim jacket by the way. And how did you get a wonder-ass like that? More bootylicious than Beyonce LOL! But I don’t see her sending me an email asking for friendship. Hmm..
Wanita3(2)

So here comes my very short reply :

wanita3

But she never understood, did she? I’d give her 5 gold stars for her perseverance and determination. It’s just hilarious how she thinks she can be so close with a person after a brief exchange of emails over the internet and trusts me with her family’s financial legacy!

wanita4
wanita5wanita6
Oh how sad. I’d donate 2 pails of sympathy to her,
wonder if that’s enough. Come, let’s all shed a tear for her?


Align CenterWhy don’t I give her a finger too?
It comes together with my sympathy in this case. Take it or leave it, woman!

attitudebitch
Or better, I could run off with her non-existent 3.8 million US dollars worth of cash and create a money dam and swim in the sea of her cold hard cash just like ol’ Uncle Scrooge always does. How would that sound? πŸ™‚

wani
Whoaaaaaaaaaaa trying to turn me on summore!

*bursts own bubble*
But this was what I replied instead :

wanita7

So guess what happened after that?
What could she be capable of? *thinks*
wanita(2)
Look into her eye and be traumatized mesmerized


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